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Secure Your Insecurities
May 9, 2017
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To the listener, air personalities sound confident and self-assuring. It's true, however, that all of us have worked with some of the most insecure people on and off-air. I got your attention and I can see you gazing a bit over your left shoulder, looking up as if you were a part of a Seinfeld "do you remember episode." In this business, we are paid to perform and not to necessarily like who we work with. HR can't hold your hand on everything; you've got to take responsibility and learn to navigate the insecurities of co-workers. It takes strategy and patience to work around someone you do not like. In the end, stay objective and stay in control by being in control of yourself.
I Could Do No Wrong
I was involved in a situation where I was the good guy and my friend who did mornings was viewed as the anti-Christ by the GM. His ratings were better than mine, yet he always got the short end of the stick. For example, I over-stayed my new hire hotel privileges for a month. The OM eventually told me I needed to find a place, surprisingly the GM defended me: "Sam has come in here and hit the ground running; he can stay a little longer if he has to." His words are etched in my memory.
Could Do Nothing Right ... Go Figure
While I was daily signing off on room service with generous tips, my morning show friend was catching hell for everything from his on-air name (The Deadly Dr.) to the volume of his voice around the office place. The GM just did not like him. The morning guy and I figured that he must have reminded the GM of someone who had done something to him. On the other hand, the GM would occasionally call me Steve by accident. Apparently, Steve was a good memory.
Oh Well...
Unfortunately, the OM who hired both of us was fired and the morning guy was demoted to overnight. When the GM realized, The Deadly Dr. was not going to quit because of his demotion, he paid him the remainder of his contract.
A Learning Moment ...
That station had the most insecure group of people I have ever worked around, but it taught me a lesson. I learned to stay focused and not let anyone throw me off my game. I became a student of not letting my ego be the elephant in the room.
Recently, I had to talk an air-personality metaphorically down off the ledge. He was frustrated with his PD.
Jock: I'm having problems with my PD.
Coach: What's going on?
Jock: The PD seems to not like me. At first I thought I was paranoid, but a bunch of little things have been going on and I have started to connect the dots.
Coach: Are you sure?
Jock: Let me give you an example. I found out that the PD had a ratings party at his house and I was the only one not there. There were no e-mails; it accidentally came up in conversation with the midday guy while we were talking. He asked what time I was going over to the party. I asked him what party and that's when I found out I was not invited.
Coach: Wow, that is not good. Anything else happen?
Jock: It got me to thinking. I recently got sent out in the van with some prizes just before my shift and if I had gone all the way to the town he had sent me to, I would never would have made it back on time for my show. I mean, it was in the sticks. It was rush hour, too, and something told me to turn back around or I would miss my first open mic. I got back just in time for my 6-10p shift.
Coach: That sounds a little strange. Are you sure he knew where he sent you was too far?
Jock: I was starting to lose the signal in the van. This whole thing is weird.
Coach: Have you ever said anything that might have upset him when he first took over?
Jock: No, I like this guy. I even told him I used to listen to him when I was growing up.
Coach: Ouch, we have a winner, my friend. He is insecure about his age and you upset him with what you said.
Jock: Are you serious? That's crazy.
Coach: How long have you been in this business?
Jock: Seven years and this is my 3rd station.
Coach: Either you've been lucky or had blinders on. Radio has more insecure people than most businesses. Thanks to your innocent comment, you are a constant reminder to the PD of his growing elder statesman status. Hey, he is insecure about it, or that's what it sounds like.
Jock: Should I say something to him and apologize?
Coach: No, leave it alone, follow directions and don't waiver from anything he tells you to do. Keep track of all memos and e-mails he sends you. Honestly, I would start putting feelers out because it sounds as if he is trying to get to you. The non-invitation and the van-hit in the boonies convince me that you are no longer wanted. Then again, maybe I'm wrong and he just wants to bring a friend in to take your slot. Either way, you better get your aircheck/demo out on the job market.
Jock: How about the GM or HR?
Coach: Well you could go to either one or both, but what are you are going to say, "He does not like me?" Unless you can prove he singles you out unfairly at work or does something illegal, all you can do is your job to the best of your ability. Don't let anything rattle you and don't spread your thoughts to co-workers. You cannot make someone like you. Remember, the only thing you can prove is that he did not invite you to a party at his house; that is not work-related. He can shrug off the van thing by saying he is still new to the area.
Coach: How do you get along with everyone else at the station ... any problems?
Jock: None that I'm aware of.
Coach: Be mindful, but not fearful of the PD. If he wants you gone, eventually you will be. And above all, don't try and get even. He is still the boss.
Conclusion ...
Try to minimize insecurities from getting in the way ... yours or anyone else's.
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