The 3 Things Blocking You From Your Goals
October 4, 2016
THERE ARE REALLY ONLY THREE REASONS YOU AREN'T WHERE YOU WANT TO BE IN LIFE.
1) You haven't created a clear, compelling vision.
When I began my own personal development journey, my coach asked me what would make me happy. I spoke eloquently for 25 minutes about everything thatmade me unhappy.
The fact is I didn't know where I wanted to go... only where I didn't want to be. That's like trying to drive cross-country without typing a destination into a GPS.
Our growth requires us to setspecificgoals. If your desire is to simply make "more money," and you make $25 more per month, you will accomplish your goal but still feel unsatisfied when the extra $400 per year doesn't drastically change the quality of your life.
So get focused. What is the exact amount you want to make? What will it allow you to do? How will you FEEL when you get that number? I have watched so many of my clients literally manifest an EXACT dollar amount when I teach them to intelligently set goals.
The clearer your vision is, the greater your results are.
2) You don't have a strategy.
This is an easy fix. There are hundreds of books available which give you a roadmap to do anything. Do you want to make a million dollars? Get a book by Dale Carnegie. Want to learn how to better invest it? Suzie Orman has written at length on the subject. Want to learn how to write a great screenplay? Some of Hollywood's best now offer online courses on the subject.
All you have to do is commit to learning and model the strategies that have worked for others.
You can also achieve results by finding a mentor who has accomplished what you want to do.
In my life, I still work with business coaches who are further down the road than I am on the entrepreneurial path. I still work with life coaches who help me see my blind spots and further my own self-development. It helps me speed up my growth process.
As Tony Robbins says, "success leaves clues." Find someone who has walked the path you are on and let them teach you how to do the same.
Now, the first two steps are easy. They are things that you can consciously choose to do today. However, if you have stated your vision, found a strategy, but still feel like you aren't making progress, there is a third issue you must face. This one is more difficult because it happens unconsciously.
3) You have inner conflicts that are blocking you.
You want to make a million dollars, but part of you is afraid that your friends and family will judge you and think you are "too good for them."
When I first launched my business, I was afraid to unapologetically tell people what I was doing. I was afraid people would think I was crazy for leaving a big, corporate paycheck behind. It kept me playing small and stunted my growth in the first few months.
Here's the truth. Every single person who has succeeded at anything has been judged by others. It comes with the territory. But if you fear judgment, you will never go "all-in" towards your vision.
Conflicts don't just hinder us in business. I recently worked with a client who cares for her boyfriend deeply. Yet, she is still hesitant to move things towards engagement. Why? She has an inner conflict that fully committing to love means losing her freedom.
That belief will make it hard to be truly vulnerable in a relationship.
These conflicts come up in hundreds of sneaky ways. Obese people want to lose weight but don't want to go to the gym out of fear that the fit people will laugh at them. Writers won't give themselves permission to write a bad first draft out of fear it will suck. Some people want to create a business empire but only work 20 hours a week.
These are conflicts.
How do you resolve them?
First, you must commit to what is most important to you right now. Do you want to chase your dreams? Or do you want to please others? You have to make a choice.
Secondly, once you make the choice to live life on your terms, you must fully align your actions with that intention. It might mean leaving some negative friends behind. It will mean setting boundaries and putting yourself first. It will require you to get out of your comfort zone.
But in the moment that you truly align yourself with your vision, doors will open. Those "coincidences" will happen where you are in the right place at the right time. The tools, relationships, and opportunities that you do need will appear.
And that's when life starts to get really, really fun!