10 Questions with ... Lamont Hollywood & Paul Tonelli

1) What was your first job in radio?

Lamont: "The Rock of the Prairies" CKDM/Dauphin, Manitoba, Canada -- Country music during the day, one-hour newscasts for dinner, funeral announcements and bug reports, Bible tapes, then straight into Ozzy Osbourne at night!

Tonelli: KWIK 1240-A/Pocatello, ID (1,000-watt Country music powerhouse!)

2) What led you to a career in radio and was there a defining moment that made you realize "this is it?"

Lamont: Going to College in Manitoba and spending all my time at the student radio station, signing up for different shows under assumed names. It was after my six months of doing shows as Barry McCackinher and Craven Morehead that I decided I'd better get a job doing this before my parents saw my GPA.

Tonelli: I was helping out on a rodeo broadcast (yes ... RODEO) outside of Pocatello and a good looking gal was impressed I worked for the radio station (all 1,000 watts of it!). I got laid and never looked back.

3) Before we talk about your morning show, can you give us some of the highlights of your radio career to this point?

Lamont: So many. Having listener nail testicles to billboard to win concert tickets for a show that was later cancelled (true story), Father's Day show live from Moonlight Bunny Ranch with Pimp Daddy Dennis Hof and having the listener have sex for the first time in 35 years because his wife left him after he suffered a stroke (nominated by his daughter ... true story), and being teamed up with Tonelli by the best GM in the history of radio David Baronfeld (who now lives in Hawaii and I'm trying to stay at his mansion for free) ... again, true story !

Tonelli: (in chronological order) First: Crashing a UPS truck trying out for a job that actually created the free time I needed to pursue radio. Second: Traffic reporting job for Traffic Central in Hayward and actually being on the air in the Bay Area. Third: and ... far and away the biggest highlight ... being teamed up with Lamont at 92-3 KSJO in San Jose. Thanks to the vision of GM David Baronfeld (best GM we've had) it was the opportunity of a lifetime. David's decision to put us together, and Lamont's years of patience, drive and attention to detail have combined to change my life and let me live a dream.

4) You guys have been rocking the Bay Area for many years starting with your morning show at the old KSJO/San Jose. What year was that and what was the origin of the Lamont and Tonelli show?

Lamont: It was 1989 when David Baronfeld procured me a mail order bride to get into the country (okay...not a true story), But Dave threw us together. He paid for us to have a night on the town in SF at Fisherman's Wharf (on trade...probably true) and Tonelli and I hit it off and decided, "let's make this thing work."

Tonelli: June of '89. I had been doing airborne traffic reports (cue "beating chest" SFX) for KSJO for a little over two years. There was a morning show opening after Perry Stone had been let go. Lamont was in Winnepeg, Canada and sending out tapes looking for a gig. He caught the ear of David Baronfeld (KSJO GM) and David paired us up. It was a totally organic and spontaneous creation of a show, literally just flying by the seat of our pants and kind of making it up as we went along. There was no real blueprint or show outline. It was a ton of fun. I always say it was kind of like the "Wild West" where we just did what we wanted, or what we thought would sound good. Lamont brought all of the "jock" experience and arranged most of the show. I followed his lead, and the partnership just kind of worked out. It has been an absolute blast!

5) When did you guys make the move up the road to San Francisco and the Bone and how did that all come together?

Tonelli: Jan. 2003. Contract issues at KSJO. Delayed offer opened the door for The Bone.

Lamont: Well, we were getting screwed around in our contract negotiations by a complete douchebag. He told us we had no other choice but to take his offer. We said "Really ! See you later Douche!" We had a contract in our hands 12 hours after our contract expired. Our old station, after 35 years of Rock heritage, was out of format in 13 months (completely 100 % true story ... including the douche part).

6) Now let's talk about the show overall. If you were to describe the show to someone who's never listened ... what would you say?

Lamont: Stuff that all guys talk about, and think about. We are the PBS of fart jokes.

Tonelli: My wife has always called it "Frat Boy Radio"... I guess that's better than "Fat Boy Radio."

(L-R Baby Huey, Chasta)

7) Who else is on the show with you guys and what are their roles?

Lamont: We have accumulated quite a staff! Chasta Michaelis is one of the most talented female talents in radio. She is the female voice of reason on the show, and she has big boobs (34D ... true)! Smelly (Eric Smeltzer) is a creative genius and one of the top producers in radio. A true show-biz professional, we snatched him from the Tijuana nightclub scene where starred as one-half of "The Best Donkey Show" in town ... (half-true ... the show wasn't that good). Ted Ramey is our Sports guy, and according to his wife, his one-minute sports reports are the most enjoyable 60 seconds of her morning (not true, he doesn't usually last 60 seconds). We also have Ben Rita and Roadie Joe working under sweatshop conditions at the back of the station. And last but not least is Baby Huey (Dan Delmore), who wears many hats (and women's clothes) behind the scenes. He handles the daily minutia of the show, and has recently been promoted to the position of "Executive Director of Digital Services" for the show. Which means we had to give him a title, because there was no money left for raises (true, radio economics these days, right?)

Tonelli: Chasta has been a valuable addition to our show as our in studio traffic gal. She has a ton of musical knowledge and great "general" knowledge, especially in the entertainment world. She's married to a professional drummer and she used to be a personal assistant to actor Sean Astin (no ... the rumors are NOT true). She usually has a different (read: more reasonable) perspective than Lamont or me, so that is very important. Baby Huey (Dan Delmore) is our producer/show archivist and organizer/Green Day fan boy. He works tirelessly in keeping our shit together, and making sure we're up to date with our web and social media. An incredibly valuable, recent addition has been "Smelly," who is a leader in writing and producing our bits. One of the funniest, most creative guys in radio. He's been a vital part of our show since he came on with us. He is one hilarious m-f.

Smelly

8) Describe a typical morning show for you guys. a) What is the process? b) How much show prep do you do and what are some of the key benchmarks of your show?

Lamont: I wake up every day at 2:30a. Grab a quick bite, go through the news and look at the prep that's been set up for me by Smelly. I commute 55 minutes to work and listen to the latest news. I try to get to work by 4a where I then listen to the sound bites and the sound and bits that we wrote the day before so we can hit the ground running at 5:30 when we go on the air. It's an endless cycle.

Tonelli: First, I think show prep happens throughout the day by knowing what's going on. There's a lot of collaboration that goes on away from the station. You get ideas when you hear stuff going on throughout the day. News and ideas are more immediate now because of the web and social media, and they're happening throughout the day rather than just grabbing a morning paper and seeing what's going on. With all of the sources of information now available, the toughest parts of show prep is sifting through the bullshit and whittling down all of the information out there; and trying to find those nuggets which most of the people haven't heard about yet. We're always trying to find stuff before it goes viral and mine bits out of it. Bits are collaborated on the day before to get set for the next morning. During the morning we will check what's happened overnight and figure out how to incorporate the dynamic news of the morning with the bits prepared overnight. We try to keep the show topical, irreverent, funny with kind of a "nothing is sacred" attitude. "Dirty Friday" is far and away our most popular benchmark.

9) Tell us some of the best and most memorable moments to date on The Lamont and Tonelli Show?

Lamont: Hands down, Super Bowel for Super Bowl. The station had NO MONEY FOR A PROMOTION (always true), so we held a contest for the biggest bowel movement the day after the Super Bowl. We encouraged people to eat as much as they could over the weekend, and we would weigh their "movements" and pay $100 an ounce to the biggest contributor. One listener crapped himself on the way to the station! BTW, it was the last year they let us think up the Super Bowl promotion.

Tonelli: If I had known you were going to ask me to remember stuff, I would have drank less the past 25 years. One of my favorites is when we got flour dust ALL over the studio and in the equipment at KSJO when we tried to find the biggest butt in the Bay Area. We had people sit in a tub of flour and measure the impression. Every time someone sat in the flour a HUGE cloud of flour dust would permeate the studio. Our engineer wanted to kill us. Roadkill for concert tickets was another promotion where everyone at the station hated us. And ... there was the live broadcast at the Moonlight Bunny Ranch where a listener blurted out the "C-Word" (crystal clear directly into the mic) during an interview on our final live break of the morning. (By the way ... there are SO many moments to try to remember ... the answer to this question could change daily based on my lucidity at that particular moment)

10) Finally, who is funniest person on the show and why?

Lamont: Everybody on the show is funny for different reasons. It's like a sitcom with well-developed characters. Tonelli is witty, I'm the cheapest man alive, Smelly is hysterical and wishes he has a Gangsta "D," and Baby Huey can't get laid and suffers from flop sweats. It's a well-oiled machine.

Tonelli: Lamont is definitely the irreverent, "Oh my God, I can't believe he said that!" guy. I offer more of a "knuckleheaded" voice of reason perspective. Lamont will provide more over the top, laugh-out-loud funny moments that might force people to pull over. I will usually throw in a pun, quick quip or other "under the radar" comment that might get a chuckle and nod, rather than a guffaw.

What do you like to do for fun and excitement when you're not in radio mode?

Lamont: Living life dangerously. Frying bacon in the nude ... and hockey.

Tonelli: We're both sports guys, but because I don't have kids I have more spare time. I played hoops until I blew out a knee, I golfed until I developed tendonitis, I used to snow ski until I hit a tree and lost three teeth, I water skied until an out-of-control ski hit me in the head and I nearly lost an eye. I played rugby for many years until I lost a testicle, I played softball until recently when I almost lost the other testicle, I am an amateur degenerate gambler, I'm in a dart league at a local bar, and I play BINGO on Thursday nights at a local church.