Overnight Briefing & General Reality Check - Jun 11, 2018

Swallowing the punch:

The power of addiction is grabbing them younger and younger. A nine-year-old girl in England has been put in rehab for her addiction to the video game, Fortnite. The girl is said to have peed herself during a 10-hour binge on the game and even hit her father in the head when he tried to stop her.
The girl's mom, CAROLE, said, "This is a serious issue which is destroying our little girl's life and someone needs to step in to ban it before it becomes an epidemic."
Editor's note:In my day, there were no bans. They called it "parenting." (Myers)

Rounding up the usual suspects:

New Jersey police found a lost pig hanging around a donut shop.
Neptune Township police responded to a call about a pig wandering loose outside the local Dunkin' Donuts. The department later joked that officers caught the porker and took him into custody "for questioning and to provide him with a job application as our new mascot." They nicknamed the pig "PORK ROLL." The pig's owner was eventually located and Pork Roll is now safely back home.
Editor's note:Pigs? Donuts? Police? With a setup like that you don't need a punchline. (Still)

Fast Food:

Sonic Drive-In is rolling out a pickle-flavored slush todayat locations nationwide for a limited time. The "Pickle Juice Slush" joins three other flavors --Bahama Mama, Blue Hawaiianand Tiger's Blood-- which are being added to their lineup this summer.
All the Slush drinks are also being added to Sonic's half-price happy hour as well. Each drink can also be customized with fruit add-ins like lemon and strawberry, or candy add-ins like Popping Candy.