Overnight Briefing & General Reality Check

Bloomberg on Broadway:

The Big Apple's MAYOR MIKE BLOOMBERG did a live impression of "Dancing With the Stars" on the Great White Way last week. Audience members bragged to the NY Daily News' Gatecrasher gossip column that the politician joined the cast of "Hair" during the show's finale and rumor has it the uber-rich politician is actually a decent dancer. (Lee)

Culture Shock:

On top of all its problems, it's clear that the Vatican also has a public relations crisis on its hands.
   It raises an interesting question: Why does the pope have such bad PR?
   Watching how the church has responded, or, more accurately, failed to respond, to the increasing number of abuse allegations even as those allegations get closer to the pope, has frustrated American Catholics, who feel they have a lot of experience that the Vatican could tap.
   The Vatican claims it is consulting with U-S Catholic leaders. And there are plenty who played key roles in helping the Church respond to abuse allegations after the subject became front-page fodder in Boston in 2002. But that hasn't appeared to help the Vatican come up with some sort of coherent communications strategy.
   Defenders of the Church say the Vatican, with its multiple institutions and automatic resistance to change, simply isn't set up to rapidly respond to a crisis. (Maiman)

Ways the Pope can improve his image (Maiman):

   --Send plague of locusts to al-Qaeda headquarters
   --Quick fling with Jessica Alba
   --Prior to mass, every kid under 12 gets a free John the Baptist Bobblehead doll
   --Perform sexy tango number on "Dancing with the Stars"
   --Deliver sermon in Gangsta rap
   --New reality show: "Extreme Blessing"
   --Trade in Pope-mobile for black Escalade SUV
   --Dump the robes, lose the pointy hat, go on the road with the Black Eyed Peas
   --Pay every American's taxes
   --Convert to Buddhism, do what Tiger Woods is doing
   --Resign

Fast Food:

We told you about this last week... today's the day that Kentucky Fried Chicken introduces its new Double Down Bacon Sandwich on fried chicken "bread." The "Double Down" consists of two pieces of bacon and cheese sandwiched between two pieces of fried chicken --either Original Recipe or grilled-- along with the "Colonel's Sauce."
   That's right --there's no bun. The chicken sorta takes the place of a bun.
   In case you're thinking about it, the Original Recipe sandwich will set you back about 540 calories, 32g of fat and 1380mg of sodium. The Grilled version is "only" 460 calories, 23g of fat and a whopping 1430mg of sodium. Enjoy!
   FYI: Here's the TV spot.
   Editor's Note: Is it just me, or does the prase "the Colonel's Sauce" seem a tad iffy? (Pacelli)

Tube Talk:

The TV Land cable channel is reuniting the cast of "The Love Boat" for the upcoming 8th Annual TV Land Awards show. The show, which starred GAVIN MacLEOD, BERNIE KOPELL, FRED GRANDY, TED LANGE, LAUREN TEWES, JILL WHELAN and TED McGINLEY, is getting the fan favorite award nearly 25 years after it went off the air. Also on the show: TOM HANKS and PETER SCOLARI, who starred together in "Bosom Buddies," and "Home Improvement" star TIM ALLEN, who'll double as emcee for the show, which is being recorded Apr 17.
   The show airs Sun, Apr 25 at 9 pm.