Overnight Briefing & General Reality Check

Pushing up daisies:

LORENE YARNELL, the female half of the mime-and-dance comedy team SHIELDS and YARNELL. She suffered a brain aneurysm at her home in Sandefjord, Norway, Jul 29. She was 66. ROBERT SHIELDS and Yarnell had their own variety show in 1977-78 on CBS. She was originally a dancer and he was a mime; they combined their styles to complement each other. Lorene also played the robot, "Dot Matrix," in MEL BROOKS' film, "Spaceballs," although JOAN RIVERS supplied the voice. The pair were married in 1972, but divorced in the mid-80s.
   Editor's note: Now she really IS in a box!
   --If a mime dies and no one hears it.... (Marino)

Married:

congrats to Brit singer ROBBIE WILLIAMS, who married U-S actress AYDA FIELD at his home in Los Angeles on Saturday. He's 36 and was the lead singer of TAKE THAT before going solo 15 years ago; she's 31 and was on "Days of Our Lives" before branching off to "Blue Collar TV" and "Back to You." Take That is reuniting with Robbie for an album and a tour, but he's basically a non-entity here in the US, even though he can sell out Wembley Stadium in the UK.

Baby patrol:

Congrats to former "Saturday Night Live" and "Parks and Recreation" star AMY POEHLER. She and her husband, actor WILL ARNETT, are the parents of a second child, ABEL JAMES ARNETT, who was born last Friday morning. Their other son, ARCHIE, is two years old.

Sick Bay #1:

DERYCK WHIBLEY hospitalized after a bar fight in Japan. The band Tweeted late Thursday night that he was attacked in a bar in Japan by three people. Another Tweet on Friday confirmed the assault but would not say how badly Deryck was hurt, or what caused the fight. On Saturday, it was revealed that Deryck was treated for a slipped disc, but decided not to listen to the doctors and performed Saturday and Sunday with Sum 41 at gigs in Osaka and Tokyo. Deryck recently got divorced from AVRIL LAVIGNE. (Marino)

Sick Bay #2:

Aging actress ZSA ZSA GABOR is still in the UCLA Medical Center, three weeks after she was admitted. Although she was due to be released Sunday, her publicist says doctors have decided to keep the 93-year-old in the hospital after she went into shock on Saturday and had a bad reaction to morphine.

Fashion Emergency:

MEGAN FOX is really impressing the suits over at Armani. The white-hot starlet models undies and jeans for GIORGIO's line and just added the title of "make-up ambassador" to her resume. A rep for the company gushed to the British tabloid the London Sun that Megs is a great fit and "embodies the spirit of women today." (Lee)

Hot punks in the Summertime:

Strange item in the police blotter in Grass Valley, CA.
   A caller told 911 that steroid-using midget body-builders from Reno, NV, had beaten up the caller's son. That's when it gets a weird.
   According to the Grass Valley Union, "Midgets from Fulton Avenue had been following and trying to poison the caller. The body-builder and the lead female midget, who the caller reported as being "really violent," allegedly had been driving the caller's truck. The caller wanted the Nevada County Sheriff's Office to activate the SWAT team."
   That is all.
   Editor's note: If midgets are using steroids and beating people up, are we still required to call them "little people"?
   --This just DWARFS any other stories I've heard today. (Maiman)

Grace notes:

You're still not going to be able to download BEATLES music from iTunes anytime soon. YOKO ONO told Reuters that Apple Inc. head honcho STEVE JOBS is (quote), "a brilliant guy," but there's one aspect to the deal that she, PAUL McCARTNEY, RINGO STARR and GEORGE HARRISON's widow, OLIVIA, are not happy with. There's no official info on what that aspect is, but, Yoko said (quote), "Don't hold your breath... for anything." (Marino)