Overnight Briefing & General Reality Check

The White House:

If you watched the president's address last night, you got the first public look at a redecorated Oval Office, which workers overhauled while BARACK OBAMA was on vacation.
   Changes include new wallpaper, a new rug, new sofas, new lamps, and a new coffee table. The rug has excerpts of famous speeches by FDR, ABRAHAM LINCOLN, TEDDY ROOSEVELT, JFK, and MARTIN LUTHER KING Jr woven into it.
   The White House wouldn't disclose the exact cost of the redesign but said it was in line with the costs of Bush's and Clinton's renovations. (Maiman)

Sucking the life out of the wire services:

Now we've got another excuse from PARIS HILTON to explain her cocaine habit... er, those cocaine charges.
   According to the Las Vegas police report, "She had not seen it but now thought it was gum."
   That turned out to be the baggie with .8 grams of cocaine.
   She faces felony drug-possession charges. Arraignment date: Oct 27.
But... RadarOnline.com says that Las Vegas District Attorney DAVID ROGER, who put O-J SIMPSON behind bars on robbery charges, is not looking to offer Hilton a plea deal and instead will be looking to put Paris away for one to four years.
TMZ.com also reports that the DA has already filed the felony case against the hotel heiress. (Maiman)

Tabloids:

Celebrity assistants spill the dirt in Star magazine:
   --the KARDASHIAN sisters all have their own thing --KOURTNEY makes her nanny ride in the back hatch of her Range Rover, KIM makes her assistants keep everyone off the lawn during parties, and KHLOE sends her assistant out to buy sex toys.
   --BRITNEY SPEARS talks in a baby voice and throws huge tantrums when she can't get her way
   --MARIAH CAREY makes sure her assistants have a chilled bottle of Cristal (pr chris-tahl) waiting for her next to her bath each night.  They've also been known to feed her pizza or ice cream like a child
   --TORI SPELLING only wants gay men on her staff
   --THE DREAM's marriage to CHRISTINA MILIAN broke up after she accused him of cheating with his assistant
   --JOHN TRAVOLTA's assistant has to keep his toupee collection groomed and ready to use in it's own refridgerated room
   --MILEY CYRUS's assistant sees her nekked most times because she likes to show off
   --KATIE HOLMES assistants are there to help her with clothes and daughter SURI and to hide things from hubby TOM CRUISE --like her occasional cigarette
   --ANGELINA JOLIE likes to talk in accents depending on her mood
   --JEREMY PIVEN waxes his entire upper body, back and front  (Myers)

Movies that will suck:

Now that we've seen just how successful the 3-D horror film, "Piranha 3-D" was, you can bet movie companies are gearing up to bring other terror films to the 3-D arena. And, in fact, Cinematical.com says "Snakes on a Plane" director DAVID ELLIS may be first out of the box with his "Shark Night 3-D," about seven teenagers on a weekend getaway at a lake house in the Louisiana Gulf.
   Then, of course, they discover sharks in the freshwater lake instead of trout or mudbugs.
   Gulp! (In more ways than one).

Grace notes:

What happens when a rapper takes over his own Twitter page? You get 50 CENT photoshopping himself as Adolf Hitler, Osama bin Laden, Saddam Hussein and Hannibal Lecter. Fitty was banned from posting last week after he put up a really nasty image of a woman with a giant hamburger wedged between her butt cheeks. He called it the "Kim K burger" as a reference to KIM KARDASHIAN. Once his Twitpic ban was lifted, 50 Cent was back it, uploading rather tasteless images. He also hurled insults at all sorts of celebrities, as well as his own grandmother. (Marino)