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In Case They'd Forgotten Why These Guys Were Such Great Catches
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A guy is accused of smearing poop on his girlfriend's back during an argument. Alcohol was involved. Of course it was. But alcohol alone isn't going to make you think that smearing poop is a good idea. That has to be in your consciousness somewhere; alcohol just removes the block you put on your weirder inclinations. And the same goes for the guy who smeared poop on a woman's car -- the suspect is the woman's ex's brother, arrested when poop on his sneakers matched with shoe prints on the car roof. When you go for the poop, there is something wrong with you. (WFTS-TV/Tampa; Wicked Local Plymouth/Old Colony Memorial)
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