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Gotta Hand It To Him (rimshot)
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This 18-year-old dude was sitting by a Florida canal at night when he fell in, and that was enough to result in his having his hand ripped off by a gator. Look, I've spent a lot of time in Florida. I have family there. My wife lived there. If there's a rule to live by there, it's this: Do NOT go into a canal or lake at night. In fact, don't go in during the day, either. Also, don't go on I-95 in Broward or Miami-Dade in daylight hours, the worst-looking shacks sell the best key lime pie, and the entire road between Yeehaw Junction and Tampa is one long speed trap. (WINK-TV/Fort Myers)
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