Attack of the Gremlins

Gremlins is a 1984 American comedy horror film. The film is about a young man who receives a strange creature called a mogwai as a pet, which then spawns other creatures who transform into small, destructive, evil monsters. Gremlins are mischievous, malevolent, vicious, vengeful, and vindictive creatures. Here’s the funny part, we all have a gremlin that lives inside us. The inner critic who judges your every thought and move, who bashes you, belittles you and assaults your self-esteem. She makes you feel unworthy, unlovable, that you won’t measure up, that you aren’t pretty enough, smart enough, thin enough, basically that you just aren’t ENOUGH at all. Most people go through their entire lives with constant inner criticism. Would you want to be friends with this person if she spoke that way to you? I bet not. Some people, however, are keenly aware of their inner gremlin to the degree that said creature has a name. I call mine Liza Minnelli. She is a heap of a hot mess. She’s disheveled, destructive and constantly criticizing my every move. “Are you really going to wear that?” “One would think at this point on your life you would have your shit together.” “Seriously? You think that’s a good idea?” Since she lives inside of me, I decided to break her down and see how I can use her existence to my advantage.

Gremlins are created to protect us. It hurts more when someone else outs us of our insecurities, so we attack ourselves internally to soften the blow and prevent embarrassment or feelings of failure. Gremlins are inner blocks, limiting beliefs, and assumptions we believe about ourselves since we were young children. It’s the absence of self-love that is the ultimate pain. In order to shift my relationship with Liza Minnelli, I first need to identify how she has helped me along the way. She has given me some serious chutzpah. Her expression of disapproval has encouraged me to up my game. Her questioning my judgement has led me to ask myself “Is this true?” Her loathing of certain decisions I made pissed me off enough to go for it anyway. Although she herself is vial, her presence propelled me into analyzing my choices. She sincerely just wants to keep me safely in mediocrity where failure and disappointments don’t live. You can’t fail if you stay stagnant. She shrouds my greatness with a looming dark shadow. Frankly, I am over her.

I recently gave Liza Minnelli a new role. She is now my teammate, my ultimate supporter and my best friend. Sure, she will slip up from time to time, I mean she’s been my gremlin for decades. It won’t happen overnight. I am, however, imagining how much more blissful and joyful life will be if Liza has loving and supportive words for me. How it will feel with her being my ultimate cheerleader vs. my ultimate enemy. My shift in perspective in terms of Liza’s new role has also shifted things on the outside as well. Nothing can change without doing the inner work first. Ironically enough (or not - lol), a recent FB memory of mine popped up with this saying... “FLAWSOME - (ADJ.) An individual who embraces their flaws and knows they’re AWESOME regardless.” I choose to meditate daily on loving myself. Just for 10 minutes – I say, “I love myself, I honor myself.”   I am reminded daily with posts in my social media feed that most people suffer from not being or feeling ENOUGH. This prompted me to rewatch an inspiring YouTube video from Marisa Peer called “The Biggest Disease Affecting Humanity: “I’m Not Enough.” I encourage you to look it up and invest 42:33 of your time. You will thank me later. Meanwhile, give that Gremlin of yours a name, investigate how they have served you in staying safe and small, and encourage them to take on a new role as the captain of “Team Greatness.” I hope this has served you as it has for me, after all it's always an Inside-Project. 

Special Thanks to Kelsey Abbott who inspired this article. Kindly check out her blog and podcast “Find Your Awesome” or follow her on instagram @kelseyabbottcpc.