Use Your Disappointment
November 15, 2011
Ever been "disappointed" with an outcome in your life or career? Things not work out the way you would like them to? There are three ways to deal with disappointment that are positive and create great momentum. Let's see how you would normally choose to handle a disappointing situation.
Maybe you did not get that promotion, did not close a particular piece of business, did not receive what you thought you were going to receive from something.
Disappointment is caused by a disconnect gap between what you EXPECTED to have happen and what ACTUALLY HAPPENED. If there is any gap between those two things at all, you have set yourself up to be DISAPPOINTED. You didn't make it. The situation didn't live up to your expectations.
You may feel like a negative event has happened to you. There are some folks who actually EXPECT LESS and that way they are NEVER disappointed. That's certainly one way to deal with disappointment. But there is a more productive way to deal with disappointment ... one that sets you on a path to greater success.
RE-FRAME THE DISAPPOINTMENT
Your future has nothing to do with your past. This is fabulous news that you need to know. Even though you may have created a bad situation for yourself (or you believe that someone else created a bad situation FOR you), you can change your life on a dime, pivot and become a success. All you have to look at is any situation in any championship sports team or winning effort. Loss was all around. And then suddenly the winning started. That's because somebody knew that yesterday has nothing to do with tomorrow ... and they PIVOTED to become winners. The great news here is that success is like that. With the right inputs, anything going "down" can EQUALLY be made to go "up" - a team, a staff, a car, an artist, a car, a career, a life, you name it.
The way to do this, to make this pivot, is simple. And takes only three steps:
1. ASSESS YOUR SITUATION
Okay, so you are disappointed. Happens every day. No big deal. Where are you now, and where do you need to get to (or get "back" to)? A problem well-defined is half-solved. How did you get where you are? What caused it? Stay positive and upbeat in your assessment. If it is to be, it is up to me is your guide. What did YOU do that caused this disappointment you are now feeling? Look inward and do not blame others for your position.
2. DRAFT THE VICTORY PLAN
In what way might you get to where you want to be? Do NOT include the way that led you to the disappointment. If anything, do it ALL differently, since you already know what you did (or were doing) that led you to be disappointed. Draft the plan that it will take to get you to a winning place. Use your previous disappointment as a guide on what NOT to do.
3. WORK THE PLAN
This is the most fun. Once you KNOW what caused the disappointment, you can QUANTIFY it, and you can use it as a springboard to build a positive PIVOT plan to succeed, you are WELL on your way to success the next time.
Launch your plan ... and watch the results begin to show themselves. You are underway to your next win!
If this all sounds crazily too simple, you are right. It IS simple. It is BASIC to the core. But every day, these very basics of negative impact and recovery are missed. This is your friendly reminder to ACCEPT disappointment, take responsibility, work as a POSITIVE to CLOSE the gap, and then reap the benefits of the success that you know you can be!
Take your disappointment, re-frame it as a learning lesson, build a plan, and move ahead to succeed again tomorrow.