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Ellen Said IF, A Word So Powerful
September 29, 2020
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Sincerity is that thing that most people’s intuition will pick up on.
Sometimes a person who has been mind-screwed over many situations in life, like a child whose parents weren’t forthcoming, or the most common, a wife whose man cheats or lies, and successfully gets her to believe that what she feels or sees isn’t real; in that situation you can create a person to NOT trust in their instincts.
I have been a staunch supporter of Ellen DeGeneres since the first day Oprah put her back on a platform to show the world her unique gifts and talents. A woman I was dating in the early 2000’s broke up with me because I had publicly declared that Ellen’s comedic gifts had been matched perfectly to a job that would shine her best heart. The woman was disgusted that I could support someone who was outwardly gay.
And that had been my struggle with the faith I hadn’t chose, but the one that God Himself chose for me on that day when the gas tank of my heart was empty and the industry had turned its back on me, only to be rescued by God when I desperately called out to Him because I had gotten to a place where IF he didn’t respond, my fate could have been like the many who come to a place where unbearable pain drives them to end it all.
I was relieved when she broke up with me, because, in her heart the battle was against people, which it never was intended to be, but she could look at a human being and see something that disgusted her; yet when God saved me minutes from my own potential demise, He instilled in me a LOVE that I had never known, and I didn’t see disgust at all, I only saw and felt the same love that God gave me on that day that I didn’t deserve His personal revelation in my life.
Where Is The Love?
To this day, when I see those who claim they belong to God, fighting with others outwardly because they don’t believe this, or disagree with them engaging in that, I realize that the blinders on the eyes of their heart have been snugly fitted, and their ability to see straight has been hindered to the nth degree.
I have been quoted as saying, “There has been more love shown on the Ellen Show than is exhibited in most churches throughout America.”
It has been many years since Ellen first returned to TV with her daily talk show, and her platform and power have grown into great influence being seen with Presidents and First Ladies and becoming a consistent figure with the elite class. And since the outbreak of the coronavirus, there’s also been an outbreak of accusation that Ellen has been vindictive, mean and downright selfish behind the scenes of her talk show.
And then came the accusations that her executive staff, behind the scenes had also become tyrants to some degree, helping to create an unhealthy work environment for many claiming to be unfairly treated, judged and demeaned.
On Ellen’s return, she was brilliantly handling the topic of her show’s work environment, using both boldness and humor to tend to the wounds which have been inflicted, but then when it was time to take full ownership, Ellen denied knowing anything about a toxic atmosphere and began speaking of those who caused it, as if pointing a finger at the fictitious guilty boogie man, and just like I supported Ellen when those who called themselves Godly wanted to burn her at the stake, I found myself wanting to find that boogie man and giving him the biggest hug ever. Sometimes that’s what it takes to change a person.
How Sorry Are You?
When it comes to apologies there are two things that can happen to sound the BS alarms in loud fashion. The first is when the person apologizing uses the word ‘apology,’ instead of the word ‘sorry,’ which in my opinion, is harder to say. “I apologize,” easy…but “I’m sorry,” not so much because one of those opens us up to self-reflection to the heel we have really been and identifies remorse, a needed ingredient in making all things good after an offense.
Then came the word that will take the air out of any truthful, remorse-filled apology, like it’s one of those double filled helium balloons they sell at Disney World, as it deflates on its way to limp land; and that word is IF.
IF I hurt you, or IF I offended you, or IF these things happened, then I apologize, or then I’m sorry…only IF these things took place. And that’s where she lost me. Let’s say it’s completely true that Ellen knew nothing of the things happening within the hallways of her own show. Once she finds them out, she is no longer in the dark and she can strongly, boldly accept blame, own it and then look at the audience and say, I am so sorry. But instead, she copped out, did a dance around the details and even set herself up as if she was the real victim. “IF these things occurred, then yes, I’m sorry…”
Stronger yet would be to have her employees come out, line up on stage and address them personally as she takes personal blame and sets the stage for all to see what can be expected of the atmosphere behind the scenes from this day forward.
Laughter Is Good Medicine Until It’s Not
After all, her name is on the show as she stated with the attempt at humor, which to me, a guy whose instincts are intact, now became a tactic to attempt to deflect from the injuries caused as she cloaked the pain in laughter instead so we could move on. But if your child scrapes his knee at the playground and rocks and dirt and sand and grass get under the skin, but all we do is take a band-aid and cover it up, then we’re not doing the proper things needed to let the wound heal as fast and as healthily as possible, and now we’ve caused a nasty yellow liquid called pus.
I know you’re reading this thinking this is an article about Ellen, but it’s not. It’s a life lesson for all of us, to take ownership and help people be better, to be vulnerable enough to spare our best life in order to give others a better one than they had previously, or maybe we can get away with being a victim, playing the role of the one who is hurt, instead of being honest about the pain we’ve personally inflicted.
We should be nurturing the instincts in our children, our spouse, and in our friends, so that when someone attempts to play the shell game with their apologies or emotions, that they don’t get distracted by the slight of hand or the laughter, but instead keep their eyes firmly on what lie underneath.
If this article has caused you any pain or hurt, I sincerely apologize.
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