Overnight Briefing & General Reality Check - Sep 18, 2017

Sucks to be you:

Actor JOHNNY DEPP is reportedly still selling his Kentucky horse farm even after it failed to sell at auction on Friday.
   The Hollywood Reportersays the top bid for the farm was a mere $1.4 million from some guy named RICK DEES (yeah --that one), well below the $2.9 million asking price. The farm has a six-thousand-square-foot house with seven bedrooms, a four-car garage, a guesthouse and three barns.

Today's police blotter:

Warning! Note sexual content!
There are much safer ways to relieve your "need" than this. A man in Germany had to call the fire department when he realized that he had gotten his man parts stuck in the middle of a gym weight.
   We're not sure what made him put it in there, but it took firefighters at least three hours to get him to the hospital, have him sedated, and remove the plate with an angle grinder, a saw and a hydraulic rescue device. (Myers)

Look what I found:

How do you like your eggs? Scrambled? Over easy? Inside another egg?
   A guy in China cracked open an egg to find a second whole egg inside. Online video shows the tiny inner egg, complete with its own shell. Word of the man's bizarre discovery spread quickly through Henan Province, causing area residents to flock to his home at all hours of the night to witness it for themselves. Experts say the mutant egg may have been caused by a hen that was frightened or nervous. It's believed to be completely edible. (Still)

Another @$#%* Press Release:

Sorry, carb lovers --you missed out on your chance to grab a Never Ending Pasta Pass from the Olive Garden. Fox News reports diehard fans of the restaurant chain bought up 22-thousand of the $100 meal tickets in just one second last Thursday. Even better? 50 "superfans" got an even better spiff --a trip for two to Italy for another 100-bucks. The vacation of a lifetime also sold out in a mere second, despite the fact that there are no Olive Garden locations in the European nation. (Lee)